To be honest – I really don’t want to even write this story! I’m sucking it up right now just writing this because I know you can never write perfectly about perfectionism!
Today I launched a new program that was full of the things that are so easy for me, so fun for me with a subject that can be so much creation, brilliance, possibility and change -with total ease!
And to me – this first launch of it? It sucked.
I was on the road, stuck in meetings all morning, in the middle of the mountains with bad reception – barely getting any of what I wanted to create done.
Then to get on a Google Hangout where the star-bucks was too loud IN A CAR with only my scarf to decorate the scenery and present to these paying clients about the greatness I knew with last minute sign ups, panics and technical issues – way to make a gal with perfectionism issues and former ballerina OCD want to curl into a perfectly rounded hole and die!
But the thing is… I’ll create from anywhere!
In a car, on a plane, in my bed, on my phone, on someone else’s computer, on my own – it’s not that I didn’t have the perfect set up, or it wasn’t the best lighting or the most wonderful presentation – but I created it.
A while ago I had a truly vulnerable conversation with Dr Dain Heer about my late father. I looking at the fights we had when I was younger about when he stopped trying to get better, I would yell and scream at him to try harder.
I was wondering – when do you give up and just let someone be with their limitations? At what point do you stop trying to show them a different possibility?
The answer? Never!
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Never stop
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Never give up
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Always keep going
So I may not have been doing the perfect job of inspiring my dad to choose greater, or giving the information I had today on this business program or in my meetings with service going in and out.
But I didn’t give up and through writing this blog post I realize that now – I will never give up.
It doesn’t have to be perfect and with our wonderful universe, it will never show up the way you think it’s going to, but it will show up if you don’t give up.
I wonder how much we have all used perfectionism as a way to give us the excuse to give up?
I know I’m not interested in excuses anymore, so today’s the day to give up perfectionism too for me.
I really wonder what will show up from here, I really don’t know!